I get knocked down but I get back up again

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I get knocked down but I get back up again

I’m not sure about you, but once in a while I have one of those months where I just can’t wait for it to get over. That was February 2019 for me. Actually most February’s are that way for me in all honesty. I think it’s because living in the Chicago area, it’s cold, snowy, gloomy, halfway point of winter, Valentine’s day, and it just plain sucks, haha.

February this year for me in all honestly started off awesome. I had a great trip to West Palm Beach for an amazing business conference with awesome people. I also had great weekends with good friends for confirmation parties, birthday parties, and even some good dates. So if you look at it from a big picture view it should have been a great month and I should stop my complaining like I always tell people! But on a micro level it was a month of the little things not being done.

The story really starts in January. I was on fire in January with kicked ass with my nutrition goals, my fitness goals, business and life goals. I was probably the most disciplined I had ever been for the first 4 weeks of January. I was killing it and I honestly felt incredible. Then as what normally happens, I start to self-sabotage. The week before my trip I got lazy and started eating out. I used the excuse of traveling the next week and that I didn’t want to have groceries in the house. In reality, it would have been better just to throw food away and next time that’s just what I’ll do. I also didn’t work out near as much that week. I was busy preparing stuff for my week gone and started to not take care of myself. Every time I do this I really struggle. And my daily habits were starting to slide as I pushed off my personal development program for other “fires” that were coming up with travel.

I went into my trip with an awesome plan on how I was going to attack the trip. I actually did a pretty good job sticking to this plan with the help of my friends on the trip. There were two things though that I could have done to help stay more focused. One was my daily journaling, it is a habit I have been very consistent with and puts me in the right mindset and I did none of it while traveling. And the other was consistent workout routine when I was there. I did workout twice but there was time every morning to get a little more training in than I did.

When I got back from my trip I stepped on the scale and this did a mental number on me. I normally am not affected by the scale weight for the most part. I weighed 231.2 before I left for the trip (7 days) and when I stepped on the scale I was 245.8. Even though I know all the reasons why this big weight number was there (inflammation from back, sodium retention, not feeling great, tired) it still messed with my mind being 14 lbs heavier in 7 days! I had a binge the next day as I was mentally struggling with recovery from that. The first week back I was in a funk of being tired and in a daze.

The next week I did my best to clean slate everything and start back right. This lasted 2 days as I was having some wicked sugar cravings and my mental discipline was still week. Every day I would work on resetting my mindset but sometime during the day I would screw up. Day after day compiled on top of each other and I couldn’t get a win streak to save my life. Not to mention I was dealing with an inflamed back and was having trouble bending over. Through all this I tried my best not to mention or bring it up to many people. I’ve always tried not to be a burden to other people in my life and in moments like these I need to get better at reaching out.

In week 3 of February I hurt my rotator cuff pretty bad and had trouble lifting my left arm. This lead to me feeling sorry for myself and wishing for the month to be over with. These are the mental head games I battle each and every day. When things are going great, my mindset is awesome, when things are going bad, I’m one little mistake away from stuffing my mouth with Swedish Fish.

The last week of the month was a longer one. Nathan was going to a meeting in Indy and I had a lot of coaching to do that week. I normally struggle with food during weeks like that because I am not good at taking time for myself. I always feel like I’m letting the business down if I don’t work all afternoon but I need to get better at knowing that each day I need to find at least an hour for myself to make sure I’m doing ok.

So that was my month of February. In the grand scheme of things, most people have way worse months than I do. 95% of bad moments in my life all revolve around food control. If I’m eating great my mind is good and I’m disciplined. If I’m eating like crap, my mindset is weak, physically I don’t feel good and I struggle to be the best version of myself. My goal with today’s post is to show you that we all have months and times where things just seem to keep to snowballing. No matter what you try to do you can’t seem to get out of that funk. But I promise, there will be a day when you wake up and the fog has lifted and that’s the time to get back to work and stayed disciplined. The thing that helped me a lot during the month is I’m a resilient person. Every day when things wouldn’t go quite right, I’d always try to adjust the plan and do it differently the next day. Even though it kept failing this month, all those adjustments will make me better and stronger at my weight loss journey over the year. This month was not a great month, I’m plus 5 pounds on the scale, maybe it’s all fat, probably mainly internal stress that I’m putting on myself, but when this year is over, I’ll reach my goal because when I get knocked down, I always get back up!


  1. Clean Slate mentally
    •  I need to continue to build a mindset of clean slating the very next meal. I think water intake goes hand and hand with this. When I eat a crappy meal, I need to realize it’s ok and then drink a hell a lot of water to clean my taste buds of that feeling of crappy good and move on.
  2. Stick to plan of discipline no matter the circumstances
    • Discipline really doesn’t get a day off and I need to work on the skills needed to stay disciplined at my weaknesses. Which for me are sugar and eating out.
  3. Don’t step on scale after traveling for at least 3-4 days
    • Every time I travel I always come back anywhere from 4-10 lbs heavier. I just need to avoid the scale for a few days so I don’t mentally mess with myself.
  4. Don’t be afraid to throw food away
    • This is a 2 fold. One is if I’m eating crap and as soon as I realize I shouldn’t be eating it, toss it straight in the garbage
    • The other is don’t worry if food will spoil if I’m traveling, still follow my eating plan and be ok with wasting some food the benefit of not eating and out and keeping my hard work in check
  5. Get out of the house
    • I have a tendency to become a hermit in the winter. I hate the cold and winter in general. It’s why every winter I have to talk myself out of moving to a warm weather climate. Each winter that’s getting harder and harder to do! But getting out and spending time outside of my place and being with others is really good for me to get the emotional connection I need
  6. Find some reason to train
    • Finding a reason to workout that’s bigger than weight loss during the winter. In the summer it’s mud runs, but in the winter I need to have another carrot to keep my training towards.
  7. Not be single in February…working on this on 😉
  8. Increase vitamin D level and light exposure
    • Vitamin D helps reduce depression and Seasonal Affective Disorder.
    • Heat lamps and other light types can help as well.
  9. Talk to love ones about struggles
    • When I’m struggling I normally keep digging a hole instead of talking to others. This is an emotional issue I need to get over.
  10. Find time for myself every damn day!
    • This is something I think everyone can practice and for me especially. I never want to let others down but I need to do a better job of not letting myself down either.

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